Not a Perfect Parent: Surviving 2 Birthday’s, Dance Recital, and Mother’s Day
Not a Perfect Parent: Surviving 2 Birthday's, Dance Recital, and Mother's Day

Not a Perfect Parent: Surviving 2 Birthdays, a Dance Recital, and Mother’s Day

by Alicia in Not A Perfect Parent Series

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I am, quite frankly, surprised I am still semi-sane after the last couple of weeks.  I was a little worried about when and if my survival techniques would kick in.   So much has been happening.  Let me premise this post by saying that life is great, I am a happy parent, and things could always be worse.

In the last few weeks I’ve had two MRIs of my brain and brain stem and found out that I have a thing on my eye that could be cancerous, or not. I’m hoping for not. The way I look at it is that there are a lot of things that *could* be cancerous.  My opthamologist dives head first into anything that concerns him in the slightest so here’s to hoping that he’s being overly cautious about this thing on my eye.  My dr. said he isn’t worried enough about it to do a biopsy so that’s good news!  I could just have a freckle on my eye.. funny, but true!

Here’s a timeline of the last couple of weeks and what’s coming up:

  • May 1st – Tim’s 40th birthday
  • May 1st – I found out about my eye issue
  • May 5th – Madelyn’s dance recital
  • May 9th – Madelyn’s 9th birthday
    • Decorate, pick up cake, and last minute goodies – AM
    • Party with friends 1-3pm
    • Take Sebastian to pick up dance date 5pm
    • Party with family 5-9pm
  • May 9th – Sebastian works at nature center (on Madelyn’s birthday)
  • May 9th – Sebastian’s school dance at night (on Madelyn’s birthday)
  • May 10th – Mother’s Day
  • May 10th – Sebastian starts Final Exam Reviews online (4 hours a night for 5 nights)
  • May 12th – Madelyn’s first ever play with acting class (5:30 – 8pm)
  • May 12th – Sebastian’s last band concert (6-8pm) – I need a clone – how do I pull this off?

Let’s get started..

It all started with Tim’s 40th birthday.   He didn’t want a big party so it was easy enough to plan.
The morning of his birthday I had a follow up appointment with my opthamologist because I failed two visual field tests recently, had laser iridotomy on both eyes for angle closure, and needed to make sure the procedures did some good.   The dr. had ordered the MRIs mentioned above, which I followed through with in late April and got clear results for a few days later.  During the follow up appointment, the dr. found a spot on my eye – also mentioned above.  While I was at my appointment, Tim went to get his emission inspection for his car registration and tag renewal and his Ford Mustang FAILED the inspection.  A couple hours later he left the repair shop having spend almost $400 to repair his car – that didn’t include the cost of tag and registration.  Kind of a bummer of a morning and beginning to Tim’s 40th birthday.

Next thing I knew, were a week out from Madelyn’s 9th birthday so guess how invitations went out –  No, I didn’t buy cute invitations at the store or send them via Evite.  I TEXTED parents a simple “can your child come to Madelyn’s 9th birthday party this Saturday?” invite!   That was pretty embarrassing.  I almost went into a long explanation about why I was texting invitations instead of sending them to school or via email – which was because I had been so stressed about my eye situation and general health issues (sick, neck pain, etc) – but who really cares?   Everyone has issues, whether it’s health, stress, being over-scheduled.  My issues are no more important than yours so I simply asked if their child could come, without apology for the late notice or explanation on why the invitation was given on such short notice.    I felt like unorganized-mom-of-the-year.   Lucky for me most of the parents responded promptly.

Dance Recital – May 5th

Madelyn had a dance recital the Tuesday before her birthday.  Tim was scheduled to work which was a bummer because Madelyn’s used to both of us being at her recitals.   I explained to her that it was going to be just her and I and she accepted it.  The afternoon of the recital I helped her get ready and we left the house 45 minutes early because I saw that a gas line burst on the main road we take to get to the venue and traffic was horrendous.  We arrived 5 minutes before showtime.  Then Tim called.  He said he was on the way to the recital..from work!  Given that his work is not nearby, I was nervous he wasn’t going to make it in time to see Madelyn’s dance and he would be upset given that he left work which is a rarity.  The stars aligned and he made it not only on time but the show didn’t start until about 15 minutes after he arrived so he got to see her dance and she saw him and she could hardly contain herself on stage when she saw him.  It was adorable!

Dance Recital

Madelyn’s 9th Birthday – May 9th

At first Tim said he wasn’t going to be off work the day of her birthday.  It’s unfortunate but it happens.  He’s in the restaurant business and when you’re in the restaurant business you don’t get holidays like Mother’s Day weekend – the weekend Madelyn’s birthday fell on this year – off.   My jaw dropped when he told me he wouldn’t be off.  How was I going to plan a party BY MYSELF?   Ultimately it all worked out.  He was able to take the day off and help with the party.  I’m no June Cleaver or one who enjoys being busy, busy, busy.  The idea of planning a home birthday party, even with Pinterest at my fingertips, is the equivalent of having to go to the library with a fussy three year old in tow, to write a Thesis.    You just wouldn’t do that – on purpose.

Madelyn was pretty bummed that Sebastian wouldn’t be around on her birthday because he was schedule to work at the nature center from 9am-4pm then he was going to a school dance from 5pm-10pm.  She was bummed and I was stressed about that.  A dance?  He’s not a center of attention, social kind of guy so he was pretty nervous.

That said, I pulled the day off and actually had fun!   I decorated inside and outside, balloons on the mailbox and everything!  The party was two hours but seemed like 30 minutes.  We had two scavenger hunts, an acting skit, cake, presents, and playtime.  Madelyn had a blast!

9th Birthday Party

Mother’s Day – May 10th

I bought my mom a Mother’s Day card when I bought wrapping paper for Madelyn’s gifts at Target a week before her birthday.   Finding the card on Mother’s Day was a bit of an issue.  After much searching and a bit of panic, I found the card on the refrigerator, where I put it the day I bought it.. for safe keeping. 🙂   Tim had to work at 9am Mother’s Day.   I slept in.  When I woke, Madelyn presented me with two miniature Orchids.  One from her and one from our puppy.  Really.

In the interim, and after Sebastian rolled out of bed around noon, the kids and I played Monopoly, one of Madelyn’s birthday presents.   The kids did what they do during the game – bickered.  I kept thinking “It’s Mother’s Day, you can’t bicker on Mother’s Day!”.  Well, there is no such thing as a perfect day I decided.

Around 2pm, after playing Monopoly for two hours, I received an email reminding me that Sebastian’s online final exam review classes start at 4:30pm – that day!  Considering I was hoping to take the kids to my mom’s house, fix her dinner to celebrate Mother’s Day, and hang out with her for a little while, I panicked seeing as how it was already 2:00.  What kind of child am I if I only stop by my mom’s house for an hour and a half on Mother’s Day?  What kind of mom and I that I didn’t realize that Sebastian’s final exam reviews started that day?

I took a deep breath and realized that my mom would appreciate any time we spend with her – any day.  She’s not one that likes being pampered.  She likes attention and effort and that’s what we gave her.

When we were about to leave to head to my mom’s house I asked Madelyn if it would be ok for me to give one of the Orchids to my mom, her grandmother.   She said “sure, you can give the one Cody gave you, to Grandmother”.  Sigh of relief!   Pulled that one off!

Mother's Day orchid


The weekend ended fabulously with us having spent time with my mom, Sebastian being home to start his final exam review at 4:30, and Madelyn and I played a fun game of Life and then Monopoly – until after her bedtime.   She gave me discounts on rent on her properties because it was Mother’s Day.  🙂

What a great weekend!

Now I have to get through the next two days.  Then I’ll be fine.  Sebastian’s last band concert of the school year is Tuesday at the same time as Madelyn’s first (ever) play!  I want to be at both but as one human being and parent, I clearly make that happen.  🙁

Perfection is something I usually realize is what took place, after the fact.  This weekend really was perfect even though things didn’t happen the way I visioned.


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